In Abuja society today there are many cases of
unmarried couples living together as husband and wife sometimes with children,
whereas no dowry has been paid to the woman’s family, neither does the parents
know about them living together. This is termed ‘Abuja marriage’ because it is
mostly common in Abuja.
Abuja marriage is a false union between a man and a
woman living together under the same roof as husband and wife, pretending to be
couple but are never actually married, they do everything that married couples
do.
This is a practice adopted from the western culture
where unmarried couples can comfortably live together for so many years and
bear children, only to break up and move on to the next person. This kind of
marriages has been recorded with so many kinds of ugly incidents.
A report was made about a man who left his wife and
children in Ibadan and came to Abuja to seek for greener pastures, in Abuja he
found a lover and she moved in to live with him, for years that they lived
together produced three children. One day the man decided that he has had
enough and moved out of the house without the woman’s knowledge. She filed a
missing person’s case to the police, some digging was done only to find out
that the man was married before with kids.
Another incident was reported when a man dragged his
ex-girlfriend to court demanding payment of his damaged properties damaged by
her. It happened that the man toasted the lady a little and then she moved in
with him to avoid things like house rents and etc. they lived together for more
than three years until one day he decided that he had had enough of her and
demanded that she moved out of his house, this resulted into a fight and she
began to smash his home electronics and upholstery. He later dragged her to
court and the female judge ruled in his favor.
The quest for single ladies to get married have now
turned into a challenge where a man can no longer have a girlfriend without her
pushing to come live with him. There has been other case where when man gets
interested in a woman, whether sexually or emotionally, she automatically moves
in to live with him, in an attempt to hold him down and influence a marriage.
Some of them will live together for more than five years and then the woman
will begin to mount pressures on the man for marriage.
The break up stories of these kind of relationships
are always unpleasant and terrible because loss of lives and properties are
always been reported in the incidents. In one unusual incident a man lived with
a woman for years, and he was planning his wedding with another woman, a week
to the wedding he broke up with the woman he was living with. On the wedding
day in church when he was about to exchange marital vows with his new found
bride, his ex-girlfriend walked into the church in a wedding gown and insisted
he must marry them both, it was quite a scene. She committed suicide the next
day.
A woman loses her value the moment she moves in to
live with a man who is not her husband or relative, in the name of relationship
thinking that it is a best way to drag a man into marriage; most times such
relationships end up in the most drastic ways.
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